To My Dearest Pizza, With Love

Pizza ♥

dangerous liaisons.

PizzaI am not ashamed to admit that I am finally in a happy, committed relationship. I know what you’re thinking. It’s not possible! Sacre bleu vat iz dis?!!

Trust me, I’m as surprised as you are, but he is simply the best thing to ever happen to me.

Of course, he is handsome, with just the perfect touch of bronze to his skin. His features are wonderfully defined, depending on his outfit du jour, of course.  I prefer him in his natural form, perhaps naked, but you could put anything  – fresh peppers, even – on his perfect body and he’d be irresistible.

His personal hygiene is impeccable. His scent is always fresh and manly, like a steamy, broad-shouldered lumberjack who has just accidentally stumbled into my kitchen. How many ladies are lucky enough to say that their man is this well groomed and clean? A far larger percent than…

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